Saturday, October 21, 2006

I Wanna Be a Part of It

So I made a resolution recently that I would actually try living in New York for a change, at least for a year. Yes, I been here for coming up on eleven years already. Yes I been in this apartment for over eight. Yes I lived here longer than anyplace other than my parents' house. Yes, yes and yes. But have I really committed to NYC? I mean really? I'd have to say no to that. As most of you know, I'm not a big city fan generally. I need peace and serenity in my daily life; I can enjoy excitement, noise, mayhem even with the best of them, but for me it needs to be an occasional occurrence, not a way of life. And too much of my time here has been spent resenting many of the city's defining qualities, the noise, dirt, expense, crowds, the sheer grinding madness of the place. Consequently a lot of my time has been spent kvetching about it, wishing I was somewhere else, wanting to figure out how to be a performer and still live in a cottage on a lake, with no neighbors but my nearest and dearest, and maybe some picturesque wildlife. I haven't actually tried to create that life however, as you might have noticed. It still appeals. It still may be where I end up somehow. But in the eleven years I've been here, I'd have to say most of my time has been spent resisting it, rather giving in to it.
Nonetheless I have known for a while that I am not done with this place yet. I'm still here, with no plans to go anywhere else, and I think that's because there is something I need to do here. So, maybe it's time to buckle down and do it. No, I don't know what that means. Career stuff seems like the most obvious choice, and it's certainly where my focus is these days, but I'm open to the possibility that there are other things to be done, lessons to be learned, etc.

What can you, dear reader, do to help me in this process? Well, maybe nothing. Maybe you can gently point out to me when I've gone on an anti-NYC rant, though chances are that won't garner you much affection at the time. But maybe you can tell me what you love about living here. Where are the places you go, the things you do and see, that are rejuvenating and inspiring? How do you navigate the lack of money in a place this expensive, without feeling deprived? What do you do when the place has you worn down? Or does that never happen? I'm sure some people thrive on the frenetic energy of the place, whereas I'm usually looking for its antidote. I'd really love insights from you about how you make this place your home.

1 comment:

Greg said...

(Greetings from Your Archives! I'm time traveling again!)

That, my friend, is a beautiful photograph, even on my newly color-blind monitor.